sacrifices

Assalamualaikum,

My last update was in the month of Ramadhan and now it's already Zulhijjah and my life has changed a lot so far. I've gone through observation which I didn't expect I would go through it well (I hope my KJ is satisfied) but things run smoothly. Alhamdulillah. Even though I haven't got the job as a school teacher, I'm grateful as this is the place for my rezeki right now. We plan and the rest is tawakal. Everything has its reasons. I need to keep that in mind. Allah has lots of plans for me that I don't see it coming, most of the times. 

Yesterday was the 10th year my father left me. I still remember the moments clearly but I try not to over think of it as I don't want to be in the past. Past is the lesson for me to the future which somehow works in a very peculiar way. In this month also I got a message from someone whom I didn't expect to hear for another 100 years. He asked for forgiveness for the first time after the horrible memories we had together. Of course, there are some sweetness in that but what I discovered is that we tend to see the bad side of our life experiences than the good side as the bad side affect us the most. Here, I would like to say something to him and if he still remembers this blog, he might know the answers for everything.

Dear you, 

Reading through your message gave me something to think about which I have already ignored for almost two years. I know we had ups and downs and we forgot who we were before. Well, as time passed by we grew older, I slowly forgive you for everything. I know you were a jerk but people change and they become wiser. Yes, your message did disturb me during my happy time and at first the angriness that I buried inside me was burning again. The hatred I had, the regrets, I was furious and there are so much feelings I want to throw at you which can't be described in words while reading and re-reading that message for I don't know how many time. I cried, maybe finally I know you suffered inside as well or maybe not. I don't know how you actually feel but I wished you suffered as I did and still do sometimes. The only thing I know is Allah has His plans for me and for that I forgive you. I hope you are happy with your life.

That's all. I hope every Muslims have a great Eidul Adha tomorrow and may our sacrifices and journey to a better Muslim is blessed. To others, may you guys have a great life ahead. :)